


You've been locked in here forever and you just can't say goodbye.

by yasminkhxns



Category: Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, This one is gonna hurt, angsty af, suppose its a nice change to hurt the doctor rather than yaz though right????, there is a quite a lot of mention of blood and stuff but not enough to say its gory really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-20
Updated: 2019-07-12
Packaged: 2020-05-15 01:05:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19284934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yasminkhxns/pseuds/yasminkhxns
Summary: She’d fucked up. She knew she had as soon as she coughed and felt the blood drip down her chin, eventually spilling onto her shirt and staining the rainbow that lay across her chest.---The Doctor returns from a solo adventure that has gone very wrong.





	1. If you lose your one and only, there's always room here for the lonely.

**Author's Note:**

> So i know i haven't posted in a while but for some reason i am able to none stop write when i'm under pressure and stress lmao??? so basically that big surge of fics from me was because i was nearing the end of my final semester at uni and was using writing as a way to procrastinate. which is stupid, so don't any of you do that pls. i'm just an idiot.
> 
> Anyway! it took me ages to get into writing anything else and now i'm back with a 3 chapter fic! I'll probs post every few days because i've got 2 and half chapters done already!
> 
> Fic title is from Apocalypse and chapter title is from Neon Moon, both by Cigarettes After Sex.
> 
> Also i want to thank @13beautifulghostmonumant for being my beta on this!! (go check out their fics too if you haven't already they're great!!)
> 
> Enjoy!

She’d fucked up. She knew she had as soon as she coughed and felt the blood drip down her chin, eventually spilling onto her shirt and staining the rainbow that lay across her chest.

 

The Doctor pressed down hard on the wound that lay just below her ribs, attempting to hold back as much of the blood as possible as it pushed its way between her fingertips.

 

The Time Lord stumbled towards the TARDIS console, pressing down a lever to set the engines whirring, then proceeding flick a couple switches and a click button while fighting the pain, determined to make it to Sheffield. To her fam. If this was it, if she was going to regenerate, she wanted to see her new found family with her hazel-green eyes one final time before someone else took over. As the TARDIS flew through the vortex, the Doctor coughed and wheezed once more, spluttering blood over the console.

 

The TARDIS landed with a groan and a thud, knocking the Doctor to the floor, who lay there for a few moments. She was tired, so damn tired of doing this over and over again that it was so tempting to just stay there. Lay there and just let the next one take over and deal with the consequences. Yet deep down, she adored her fam too much to do that to them, to leave them with a stranger without having explained a damn thing. Pushing back the thought of where all this pessimism had suddenly come from, the Doctor grabbed for the edge of the console, latching on as she hauled herself back up and stumbled toward the doors. praying Park Hill flats stood outside them.

 

Enough luck made sure they did as the Doctor dragged herself toward the building and to the lift, flopping against the wall of it as she pressed the button for the 5th floor. Her breathing was laboured as she struggled to stay on both feet.

 

The Doctor stumbled through the lift doors as she reached Yaz’s floor. Finally arriving at her friend’s flat, she gave a few hard raps and lent against the frame with all the hope that her friend would be in.

 

The door swung open to reveal none other than Yasmin Khan and in that very moment the Doctor could’ve cried with relief if the tears in her eyes weren’t already there from the pain of the wound in her side.

 

The Doctor watched Yaz’s face switch from joy at seeing her friend to panic within seconds at seeing the aliens pale face and the blood dripping down her chin onto the significantly bloodier shirt.

 

“Doctor?!” Yaz quickly ushered her inside and onto the sofa. “Doctor what happened?! It’s been three months and you come back in this state?!”

 

The Doctor lay back on the sofa, resting her head on a cushion as she processed Yaz’s words.

 

“Three months.. blimey. I... I really messed this one up.” She took a husky breath, “Didn’t I?” The Doctor let a pained chuckle pass her lips as the whole situation crashed down on her like she had on the sofa. The chuckle quickly turned into a cough as more blood trickled out the side of her mouth, Yaz’s eyes welling up with tears at the sight of it.

 

Yaz’s voice trembled as she spoke. “Doctor, just please let me help you, tell me how I can help you!” A tear spilled down Yasmin’s cheeks on the final word, terrified for her friend.

 

The young woman rushed into the kitchen and grabbed the first aid kit along with a bunch of kitchen towels, not waiting for the Doctor to reply. “Don’t you dare go die on me now, you stupid alien!”

 

Seconds later, Yaz dropped down at the Doctors side and began pressing a towel onto the deep wound that tore across the Doctor’s side, who let out a cry of pain at the sudden action.

 

“Sorry.”

 

“It’s.. it’s fine, Yaz.” The Doctor replied, weakly placing a red stained hand over Yaz’s as she continued. “It’s just... If I regenerate... I didn’t want to do it alone this time. If do, regenerate... I want you to understand, that even though,” she took a long breath. “even though my face will change, it’s still me.” She gave Yaz a weary smile, chin wobbling with the reality that she might actually regenerate in Yasmin Khan’s living room. The rest of her family would have a hell of a lot of questions.

 

“Doctor, I don’t understand. Didn’t you say before that regeneration is that glowy thing you did at Ryan’s? Why would your face change?”

 

The naivety of Yaz’s question made the Doctor regret not having explained regeneration to her fam sooner, as her mind fogged while she attempted to briefly explain it all. “Right-” she started before another cough interrupted her, causing her to hiss in pain. “You know when said... I was a white-haired Scotsman?”

 

Yaz nodded.

 

The Doctor raised her eyebrows, “I wasn’t joking.”

 

“You mean, you really were a man? Before?”

 

“Yup, 12 times before actually.”

 

Yaz was about to respond. Clearly lots more questions were on the tip of her tongue but before she could ask any of them the Doctor began coughing once more until it developed into an aggressive fit, blood spattering against her hand she covered her mouth. When it finally subsided, the Doctor flopped back down against the sofa in exhaustion with a pained grunt, not bothering to wipe her mouth, which was now tinged with a lipstick of blood. Her limbs were feeling heavier by the minute.

 

The Doctor’s quickly deteriorating condition sent Yaz into a panic and had her pressing one of the kitchen towels more firmly into the Doctor’s wound. Yaz opened up the first aid kit with her other hand, a distraught look etching across her face. The Doctor glanced down at the kit to see a few plasters and alcohol wipes were the only things stashed inside. Clearly the Khan’s hadn’t re-stocked in a while.

 

“Well... I don’t think a plaster is gonna do much good.” The Doctor said attempting to lighten the mood.

 

“Doctor, I’m so sorry. I don’t know what to do. Do I call an ambulance? Do I-”

 

“Don’t be daft. No... no ambulance. Human hospitals... are useless for me.”

 

The Doctor could feel herself growing more tired as she lifted her hand weakly to lightly cup her friends cheek, softly stroking a thumb across her cheekbone to wipe away the tears that now flowed freely down her cheeks.

 

“Yaz, my wonderful Yaz. It’s… it’s going to be alright. Just know...” The Doctor was becoming aware of the black dots creeping into the edge of her vision as she spoke, trying to keep her concentration focused on Yaz. “Even if I change, I’m... I’m still me. Ok?”

 

Yaz cupped the Doctor’s hand, which still rested on her face. While her other hand, now covered in orange-tinted blood, was still pressing the towel down on the doctor’s wound as more tears escaped her eyes.

 

Yaz’s voice quivered as she spoke around light sobs. “But I don’t want you to go! I don’t want you to change. I like you like this. Love you like this. You’re the Doctor, not anybody else. You’re the one that crashed through that train roof and changed my life forever. I want to spend the rest of my life travelling the universe with you, not a different version.”

 

As Yaz spoke, the Doctor’s limbs became weaker, her hand slipping from its grip on her companion’s face and flopping against the sofa as she finished.

 

“Doctor?!”

 

Her voice was barely a whisper now, as she began to lose her final grip on consciousness. “Yaz… I’m sorry.”

 

The Doctor stopped fighting the darkness that shrouded her vision, letting herself slip into the shadows of her mind as she heard her companion’s final plea to stay, unable to comply.

 

 


	2. And when you go away I still see you, with sunlight on your face in my rear-view.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter i would say is considerably lighter than the last! I can't hurt people for too long jsdkgjhdgfkjfdkg
> 
> Chapter title from Sunsetz by Cigarettes After Sex
> 
> AND thank you so much to my beta @13beautifulghostmonument <3

When the Doctor’s eyes finally flutter open, it’s to brightness of the midday sun that forces them shut again with its intensity, and the bitter smell of freshly brewed coffee wafting through the air around her. The Doctor lay there for a moment, before slowly opening her eyes again, adjusting to the environment around her. She was in Yaz’s flat, laying on the sofa, a soft maroon blanket draped over her, dressed in a pair of navy-blue flannel pyjamas.

 

 A wave of panic crashed over her as she realized what may have happened to her during her blackout. Hands quickly reached up to grip her hair, feeling along a length that felt familiar, and pulling a clump in front of her eyes to see blonde hair that matched the brightness the rays beating down on her. Hands drifted over her face and felt familiarity in the shape of her nose, the curve of her jaw, down her neck to a now recognisable chest. The Doctor turned her head and caught her reflection in the black screen of the television, relief washing over her as the same face as before the blackout stared back at her.

 

The Doctor tentatively pushed herself up into a sitting position, careful not to jar any injuries that may remain as she scanned the rest of the flat. She quickly discovered the source of the smell of fresh coffee when she spotted Najia in the kitchen pouring herself a fresh cup. The Doctor observed the older woman for a moment as she brought the beverage to her lips to blow on it.

 

“Hi Najia!”

 

Najia spun around to face the Doctor, mug slipping from her hands in shock as it crashed to the ground. Within seconds, the Doctor was vaulting over the sofa apologies falling from her lips as she came to stop in front of the woman.

 

“Oh God, it’s even got all over your trousers! I’m so sorry Najia, really should’ve thought that one through. Have you got any kitchen roll or something so I can help you clean this up?”

 

The Doctor looked up at Najia’s face, confused by her silence until she saw the pure shock painted across it. The Doctor’s eyes widened as she held Najia’s gaze for a few more moments before looking back at the sofa, then back to Najia once more.

 

“Ah, yes. Right. I’m sure I’ve probably been passed out on your sofa for quite some time, haven’t I? This is a bit awkward. Though I’m sure Yaz has explained, or I hope she’s explained so that I don’t have to. Not very good at explaining myself to a parent, been slapped for it more than once but you’re absolutely lovely Najia so I’m really hoping you won’t do that to me-”

 

“Doctor!” Najia cut her off and rested a hand on her shoulder. “I’m not going to slap you.”

 

The Doctor grinned. “Oh! Good. Phew. Really trying to avoid that. Been doing so the last couple thousand years. I think?”

 

Najia smiled softly in return. “You’re lucky my daughters already spoken to me about you. Or that final comment would’ve been particularly strange.”

 

“Yeah, would’ve a bit wouldn’t it?

 

Najia’s hand dropped from the Doctor’s shoulder to point down at the floor. “Now, come on, help me clean this up. You’ve been lounging on my sofa all week. Think of this as payment.” Najia reached behind her to grab the kitchen roll and passed it to the Doctor with a wink. As the Time Lord cleaned up the mess, Najia made herself and the Doctor another drink, passing the Doctor a cup of tea from where it rested on the coffee table as she made her way back to the sofa after cleaning up the mess.

 

The Doctor raised the mug to her lips and took a quick sip to test the temperature, then a bigger gulp after it passed the test. She hummed as the warm liquid made its way down her throat.

 

The Doctor tucked one leg underneath herself as she turned more fully to face Najia and lifted her mug as she spoke.

 

“You make a brilliant cup of tea, Najia.”

 

The older woman smiled and nodded in thanks.

 

“But I do have a couple of questions. Firstly, where’s Yaz? And secondly, as lovely as these pyjamas are, do you have any idea where my clothes are? Especially my coat, it means a lot to me that does.”

 

Najia took another sip of her coffee and lowered the mug to rest on her knee before answering.

 

“She’s gone to the shops. On my request. It’s the only way I could get her out of the flat apart from work. I was hoping the fresh air might do her good. Stop her from worrying about you for half an hour while she’s got my list to concentrate on.”

 

The Doctor offered Najia a guilty smile, aware of the distress she’d probably caused Yaz and her other friends while she’d been unconscious.

 

“Sorry. Don’t really know what I was thinking at the time. The pain I was in must’ve made me a bit delirious, coming here was a terrible idea. If I’d actually regenerated I would’ve wrecked your flat!”

 

Najia chuckled as she shook her head. “I’m not even going to pretend to know what that means. But I’m just glad you’re ok. For your sake, and my daughters. You better be prepared for when she gets back.”

 

It was another 20 minutes before Yaz returned, but it was 20 minutes too long for the Doctor, who once Najia mentioned her daughters impending return, couldn’t sit still. The Doctor killed some time by changing into the fresh clothes that Yaz had obviously gone and fetched from the TARDIS at some point, though her mind was continually racing with all the explaining she knew she had to do. The Doctor loved explaining things, yet, as she paced around the Khan’s lounge trying to figure out what she was going to say, or even remember what she had said to Yasmin in her half-conscious state, she knew this was going to be a difficult one. She knew Yaz was going to be confused. She never even explained what regeneration was to her fam, or a healing coma, which is clearly what she had been in for the past week.

 

She had thought keeping more to herself in this regeneration would be for the best, which had turned out to be a massive mistake. She inwardly chastised herself as she thought about how much worse the whole situation could’ve been. A newly regenerated Doctor, who would’ve destroyed the Khan’s flat, maybe another woman, maybe back to man. She shuddered at the thought, she actually really liked being a woman, wished it’d happened sooner. The Doctor’s thoughts were interrupted by the sound of Najia’s voice.

 

“Doctor, while you wait for Yaz could you at least sit down? You’re making me dizzy walking in circles like that.”

 

The Doctor lifted her head from where it had been ducked into her chin to peer over at Najia who was sitting at the kitchen table, reading a book.

 

“Yes! Right. Sorry.”

 

The Doctor flopped down on the sofa, knee fidgeting with nervous energy. She sat there in her own head, thinking about the incoming reunion with her best mate, who 20 minutes after the Doctor’s conversation with Najia, walked through the door.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you for reading
> 
> Kudos and comments are greatly appreciated!!
> 
> (also thank me later, i almost uploaded this drunk so tbh if there are mistakes you can fully blame me)


	3. Baby I'm a firefighter, trapped in a burning house in a silent picture

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Doctor and Yaz have got some serious catching up to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Final chapter everybody yasssss!!! Thank you to everyone that has read and stuck with this little story!!
> 
> This would've been out sooner but i've had such a busy week i just haven't had time to post anything!
> 
> Chapter title is from I'm a Firefighter by Cigarettes After Sex. (Have you noticed the theme of chapter titles yet kjkjfs)
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

Yaz stepped through the door to the flat and shrugged off her coat and boots as she called out to her mum.

 

“Mum, I’m home! They didn’t have your favourite green tea, so I just got the-” Yaz immediately cut herself off as she stood frozen at the end of the hallway as soon as she spotted the Doctor, stood in the lounge, looking like her normal self.

 

“Doctor…”

 

The Doctor gave Yaz an awkward smile, somewhere between a grin and a grimace. “Hi, Yaz.”

 

Yaz dropped the shopping bag she was holding as she charged toward the Doctor and captured her in a bone crushing hug. The Doctor quickly returned it, enveloping Yasmin just as tightly, burying her face in Yaz’s neck.

 

Yaz could feel her eyes welling up in relief that she was hugging her friend who was very much alive and well, looking exactly as she should.

 

“You’re ok.” She muttered into the Doctor’s chest.

 

“I’m ok.”

 

An awkward clearing of the throat broke the two women apart as Yaz turned around to see her mum sat at the kitchen table, placing a bookmark in her book as she slowly stood from her chair.

 

“Well, Yasmin. Doctor. I’m going to go and take a conveniently long walk while you two have a chat. I’ll see you later.” With that, Najia headed down the hallway, popped her coat on and was out the door before either woman could reply.

 

Yaz spun back around to face the Doctor to see her with a mildly stunned expression. It was then that it all came crashing back down on Yaz. The Doctor was stood in front of her after stumbling into her flat a week ago, bleeding everywhere and making her think she was practically dead. She took a step back, looked her friend up and down to see she was perfectly healthy and smacked her on the arm.

 

“Ow!” The Doctor rubbed where Yaz’s hand had connected. “What was that for?!”

 

“For making me think you were dead, you idiot!”

 

“Oh. Right. Yeah. Probably deserved that to be honest.”

 

Yaz dropped down onto the sofa with a huff. “Yeah. You did.”

 

The Doctor tentatively sat down next to Yaz and faced her, while Yaz continued to stare dead ahead.

 

“So I figure I’ve got a bit of explaining to do.”

 

Yaz’s head whipped around to face the Doctor. “Just a bit. Had to have a great conversation with my mum by the way. Thanks for that.” The sarcasm dripping from her voice.

 

“Yeah. She mentioned. Sorry about that. Really, Yaz. I am. I know I must’ve terrified you jabbering on about a load of nonsense you didn’t understand, coming in all bloody and battered like that. My brain was all over the place after everything that had happened.”

 

“What did happen Doctor?”

 

The Doctor sighed dejectedly, and looked down at her fidgeting fingers, seemingly apprehensive to talk. Yaz shuffled closer to her friend and placed a hand over both of the Doctor’s, hoping the small act of comfort would help.

 

“Doctor?”

 

The Doctor let out a long breath and nodded her head.

 

“I failed.”

 

* * *

 

 

_The Doctor was tired, she’d spent far longer on this planet than she ever intended, trying to stop this war. She’d finally managed to talk one side into agreeing to a peace treaty. Now, she remained stood in front of her final obstacle, General Kaze of the Ahra. His hand gripped tightly on the hilt of his dagger which remained sheathed. A way for him to feel more in control, she supposed._

_She was so close. So close to fixing it. To sorting it all out. All she had to do was talk General Kaze down, then this whole war could be over. The general was tense, as the Doctor took a step forward, kicking up dust, hands up in surrender. She couldn’t risk being seen as a threat. The stakes were already too high._

_The Doctor knew when she walked into this tent two minutes ago that this wasn’t going to be easy. Aware that the Ahra were a stubborn race, too proud, she thought. Reminded her of her own people._

_“I’ve got no weapons, if that’s what you’re worried about. Think they’re rubbish.”_

_General Kaze gestured a guard over, who patted her down, turning to give his General the all clear._

_“You may lower your hands.”_

_The Doctor did so, flicking her coat tails out of the way as she moved to stuff them into her trouser pockets._

_“Oh, thanks. Very kind of you General Kaze. Now, I understand that you know why I’m here.”_

_The General nodded. “To discuss peace talks.”_

_The Doctor grinned, trying to charm the general. “Brilliant. Well, I’ve had a good long discussion with the leader of the In’ai, and they have agreed to peace, but have some terms, obviously.”_

_“Why should we agree to any of their insulant terms?”_

_The Doctor fought back the urge to roll her eyes at the Ahra’s superiority complex._

_“They are wasting this land. We, the Ahra, could do so much better with it. Industrialize it. The Ahra are too powerful and grand to be confined to just the mainland. We can do so much more with these outlands. We deserve these outlands. They only want peace because they know they will lose.”_

_The Doctor shook her head and took another step forward._

 

_“You’re wrong. The In’ai want peace because they are tired. Sick of fighting such a ridiculous war. One you started might I add. They were living their lives peacefully until you started to invade. Too many people have died in this war on both sides and they know that.” The Doctor’s hands gestured wildly as she spoke passionately. “They just want to live, General. Keep their families safe, your families safe, from losing anybody else. It’s their land this war has taken place on. They just want it back. And I think you owe them that.”_

_“We don’t owe them anything. We could give them jobs, they could prosper. Think of the opportunities their land could give us.”_

_“Yes. The opportunities the land gives **you**. Not them. They don’t want their land industrialized General, don’t you see? They just want to live on it, peacefully. They farm that land and live happily on it. They don’t need or want your jobs. If you want opportunity, give them a fair opportunity. Like trade, where you would both be on equal ground.”_

_General Kaze gave the Doctor and inquisitive look. “Trade?”_

_“Yes!” The Doctor spoke excitedly. “You could easily figure something out through some talks. You could both prosper! Can’t you see the positives, General? Think about what you could gain from trade with the In’ai. They’re very smart people.”_

_The General paused and took some time to consider. The lull in conversation giving the Doctor hope. Only her hope was shattered at the next word to come out of his mouth._

_“No.”_

_The Doctor’s face dropped. “No? What do you mean no? Why would you say no?!”_

_General Kaze strode forward, stopping barely an inch away from the Doctor’s face. The Time Lord glared back in frustration, unthreatened by the man’s assertiveness._

_“Because those insignificant beings cannot give me what I want. The only trade I, and the rest of the Ahra want, is their land. If they won’t give it to us. Then we **will** take it from them.”_

_The two of them continued to stare each other down. Both unwilling to move, holding their ground, until finally General Kaze stepped back but only in an attempt to breeze past the Doctor and back to the battlefield._

_The Doctor stuck her arm out, blocking him. The darkness in her eyes concealed by the blonde locks falling across her face._

_“I can’t let you do that.”_

_The General laughed mockingly. “And you think you’re going to stop me?”_

_The Doctor moved her entire body in front of him, looking up at the General and once again facing him dead in the eye, smirking._

_“It’s kind of what I do.”_

_General Kaze glared back at her. “I’ve heard about the stories about you, Doctor. How you seem to pop up all over the galaxy ‘helping’ people. Even been seen in the past apparently. Same person, different face. Well, you know what? I don’t believe a single word.”_

_The general grabbed the Doctor’s arm in a bruising grip while unsheathing his dagger with the other and plunged it into the Doctor’s side. She let out a cry of pain, tears springing to her eyes as the point of the blade pushed through her skin. Glancing down, she could already see the blood soaking through her shirt. General Kaze pulled her in closer, only making the dagger press in further, causing her to cry out once more as her hands flew to the handle where one of his rested in an attempt to stop it from piercing her deeper._

 

_“This is what I believe, Doctor.” He spat his words at her. “I believe in getting the job done and getting what I want. And do you know what I want? I want the In’ai’s land, and I want **you** out of my way.”_

_On his final word, the General tore the dagger upwards, slicing up the Doctor’s abdomen, as her scream ripped through the tent._

_“Let’s see how ‘helpful’ you are now.”_

_The General yanked the dagger out of the Doctor and took a step back as she crumpled to the floor, hitting the ground with an agonizing thud._

_General Kaze stepped over the Doctor’s body as he made to exit the tent, kicking dust up in her face as he ushered the guards to leave with him. The Doctor remained on the ground, alone. Trapped in her own head with her newest failure pressing down on her. Tears rolled down her cheeks, dampening the dirt beneath her face, only adding to the way it stuck to her skin. The wound in her side throbbed, any movement was excruciating. The exhaustion of the war crashed over her in waves, making even the thought of trying to stand near impossible._

_The thought of giving up was at the forefront of the Doctor’s mind as she lay there, clutching at the wound in her side. She could feel the stickiness of the dirt and sand from the blood that had pooled in it, caking her hands in the mixture. Memories of the Time War flickered through her mind, the sandy backdrop and the heavy losses weighing her down. Until the thought of lost family made her think of her own. Her new family, her fam. She thought about how if she lay there and gave up, they would wait for her forever, only for her to never show up again. They’d think she had abandoned them. Simply the idea of that added to her pain, yet, it was also that idea that forced to roll onto her back, then slowly sit up through quick breaths as she pushed through the pain that gushed from her side._

_Finally, with great effort Doctor clambered to her feet, hands clutching at her side in an attempt to stop the blood that was dripping over her fingers, falling in droplets to the ground, and took her first step towards the TARDIS._

* * *

 

 

When the Doctor next peered up at Yaz, the young woman watched as a tear rolled over her friend’s cheekbone. Almost instinctively, she reached forward and caught it with the back of her index finger before it slipped away. The Doctor smiled gently in gratitude.

 

“Doctor, I’m so sorry that happened to you and the In’ai. But you shouldn’t blame yourself, you can’t control someone else’s thoughts. You didn’t know he was gonna do that and clearly he didn’t want to change out of his selfish ways. You’re right, those Ahra’s are arseholes.”

 

A teary chuckle pushed passed the Doctor’s lips at Yaz’s choice of language, who was pleased to be able to cheer her friend up, even it if it was just a little bit.  

 

“Yeah.” The Doctor wiped at her eyes, the discomfort of being vulnerable in front of her friend prickling in her chest. “They are a bit.”

 

Yaz could almost feel the guilt still emanating off the Doctor in waves, making the need to reassure her friend grow. Yaz shuffled closer to the Doctor on the sofa so that they were hip to hip and slung an arm over her friend’s shoulders, pulling her into a sideways hug.

 

“Come here.” Yaz maneuvered her hand from where it still rested over the Doctor’s up to the side of her friend’s head and stroked her fingers through wisps of blonde hair, letting the Doctor rest her head in the crook of her neck. Yaz was nervous the Doctor would be weary of the affection, but she gratefully accepted as she gently enveloped Yaz’s waist in her arms.

 

“Thank you, Yaz.” The Doctor mumbled into Yaz’s neck, her breath against Yaz’s skin making the young woman’s breath get caught in her throat. “You’re so good to me. I should count myself lucky I fell through that train.”

 

Yaz chuckled in amazement. The fact that the Doctor thought she was the lucky one baffled her. They were the ones that found themselves lucky enough to be on that train to stumble across a time travelling alien, the Doctor just got some silly old humans to travel with.

 

Before Yaz could open her mouth to question the Doctor’s words, she pulled away from Yaz’s hold, making sure she was looking her in the eye as she spoke up. “And don’t you dare go selling yourself short, Yasmin Khan. You, Graham and Ryan are all incredible. I don’t just let any old human travel with me, you know. When I say you lot are my family, I mean it. Speaking of, you should probably let them know I’m awake.”

 

Yaz sat there, lips parted for a moment, anything she wanted to say dying on her tongue. She could see the sincerity in the Doctor’s eyes as she spoke and knew she meant every single word. It wasn’t until the Doctor called out her name that she realized how long she’d been staring.

 

“Yaz?”

 

Yaz jolted up off the sofa at her name, the heat of a blush creeping up her neck. She pulled her phone out of her back pocket as she rounded the sofa.

 

“Right, yeah! Graham and Ryan, I’ll just give them a call. They’re gonna be so relieved.” The Doctor gave Yaz a soft smile in reply.

 

* * *

 

 

 “Flippin' heck, Doc! That’s something.”

 

“I still can’t believe you went off on your own. It’s like you forget how much trouble you get into without us. Still, I’m glad you’re ok.”

 

Ryan and Graham sat on the sofa adjacent to Yaz and the Doctor as the Time Lord re-told what had happened. A barrage of emotions flitted across both their faces, impossible to keep up with as she spoke. 

 

“Yeah, me too.” Graham leaned over and patted the Doctor on her knee, hoping to offer some extra comfort.

 

They all sat in a comfortable silence for a moment until Graham piped up. “Tell you what, I don’t know about you but I’m a bit peckish after listening to all that palaver. Anybody fancy some ice-cream? The new creamery that just opened up in town has got some great reviews.”

 

The Doctor’s gaze darted to the older man, her expression morphing into one of pure adoration. “Graham O’Brien, you’re a genius. Come on fam, let’s go. Now you’ve mentioned it, I’m absolutely starving.”

 

The Doctor was already halfway to the flat door as she started rambling on about some alien ice-cream she had once that made her sick for a week, the three humans listening on intently in amusement at their friend’s crazy stories. The Doctor opened the door for them as she finished her story, letting them all go out ahead of her before pulling it shut behind her and hanging back with Yaz as she locked it. The two women kept up a brisk pace to catch up with the boys, the Doctor’s hand casually slipping into Yaz’s as they walked, who tensed for a moment at the contact but quickly relaxed into it. The Doctor looked over at the brunette beside her to find she was already returning the gaze.

 

The Doctor smiled warmly at Yaz, noticing a flicker of something not quite discernible in her young friend’s eyes. “Ice-cream with the fam, amazing.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know when they go for ice-cream the Doctor gets it all around her mouth like an idiot
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> comments and kudos are greatly appreciated!!!

**Author's Note:**

> yeah, soz
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> thanks for reading and comments and kudos are greatly appreciated!


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